Recently, at work, we were talking about maiden names and name changes after marriage. For me, that also includes a name change after divorce. I don't ever plan on changing my name again, and let me tell you why. First, everyone is different. What is right for one person, isn't for the other. So this is absolutely not an advice article. I was head over heels in love, and changing my last name to reflect my husband's was a simple, expected, and welcomed step in my marriage. I never thought twice about it. However, once I was going through a divorce, I started to think about my name a lot differently. After John and I separated, I immediately wanted to change my last name back to Mills. For those of you who know John, his last name is long, contains a lot of vowels, and is pronounced wrong nearly 90% of the time. But, to be honest, that had little to do with why I wanted to change my name back (however, it was a welcomed perk.) I had become so enveloped by being John's wife, that after I lost that title...I felt like I had lost myself. My identity was no longer clear. BUT...changing your name is a REAL pain in the ass. I briefly considered keeping my married name, just to avoid the hassle of changing it. However, after the crippling pain that is divorce, I had to make some decisions for myself...no matter how much hassle it caused. SO, I went back to Mills. I began building my career with that last name; I began rebuilding my life with that last name; and I began finding myself again. And that is the real reason I don't intend on ever changing my name again. But hey...never say never, right? So...if you want to be Mr. and Mrs. Smith...or Mr. Smith and Mrs. Jones...or just Ms. Jones...Don't ever let society or anything else pressure you. Do what your heart tells you and choose your own identity...it will liberate you! All my love.
1 Comment
Daddy
12/21/2017 06:25:01 pm
There are only two types of people in the world. Mills’ and those who wish they were Mills’.
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December 2017
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